One hell of a week.
This last week was intense. I finally started my other two jobs with the training and stuff. It involved a lot of waking up early too which made me tiiiiirreeeeeddd to the max. But I got through it. Now my decision is to decide if I want to keep these three jobs altogether. It’s a lot of work and strength, but I think I can build up the persistence to do it. Jamba juice, edible arrangements, and tutoring…You’re on. And I gotta juggle going to city and state schools. I’m only taking like three classes which isn’t too bad. And besides, one is tennis. That’s my relaxing/take out aggression class between everything. ahha. I’m really trying my best to remember to take it easy and to take breaks. Maybe not this semester too much, but I know I will enjoy it all. These opportunities you can’t replace. I get to rebuild friendships with people at jamba, I get to meet new people at Edible, and with tutoring, I actually get to HELP someone and not serve them. Dance will still be a part of my life too in my schedule. And I will always love dance. Everywhere I go, I will exhibit it and how much passion I have for it. Lmao even at the clubs ;). At school I get to see new faces and continue my path for the future, still trying to decide what I want to do. All of this crazy shit will be worth the hard work and make me happy. Because I will definitely feel like I did something with my life, for sure.
Anyways, besides all that busy stuff. The weekend was pretty fun. Slept in for a day, well tried to. Woke up to family everywhere for chinese/viet new year. Getting those stacks of paper, yknow. lmao. still grateful tho. not too boastful. Then went to the boy’s housewarming! FUCK. Nice. ass. house. for dayssssss. So envious they get to live like that at such a young age. Pretty fucking nice, and especially the whole house filled with tons of friends was legit. After that, had to leave early cause another group of us was going to the club. It was lame. the same old shit. I still got to dance my ass off. And by the end of night, someone ended up complimenting me about it, how I was tactical, and that he liked my dancing. It helps maintain confidence in dance, because believe me, in the dance world, it is so easy to tear yourself apart. It’s all in your mind. Anyways after did the usual of Denny’s, not too shabby, and ended the night there. Still a well deserved night of fun. Thy friends are cool.
The next day, aka sunday, I was helping some coworkers by covering their shift. I ended up going to a little kids basketball game to sell smoothies. Oh well whatevs, at least I got to go home early and not stay til close. Whoo hoo. Then came home to the familia and to finish celebrating the new year. Ate, and got them red envelopes. Definitely gonna try my best to save this year.
Besides that, my grandpa is really worrying me. My family is flying in from the airport to check up on him. And that just shows seriousness. I’ve never had anyone so close to me on the verge of passing away. But it just eats at my heart. That’s my mom’s father. All of his eight kids are my aunts and uncles. He’s been there for so much of our lives and even the newborn and younger kids. It’s just so crazy how it makes you realize how sometimes days can really be limited. I’m not sure what to do, nor who to talk to, to get advice, but I hope I will have the strength to stand by my family through whatever happens. I love them. They are my life. They mean so much. I just hope everything will be okay. :’[
Really don’t take things for granted.
I want to say things I didn’t say. I don’t hold grudges. I’m too nice and forgive easily. But I don’t mind. I’d rather spend my life loving than hating. Which reminds me of the feeling of being ignored by people. I hate that type of situation. I wish people would just tell me and confront, instead of using ignoration. It’s not worth it. Well to me, it isn’t. I’m afraid to lose people, but that’s because I hold whoever I meet in my heart dearly, no matter how big or little significance you hold to me. It doesn’t matter. You still affected my life in some way.
Anyways, fuck, I should be trying to sleep. Gotta wake up for a long day, week, life tomorrow. I just hope things won’t be taken for granted anymore by myself and others. God, I really pray for my grandfather and I thank you for everything, every single day I wake up.
Goodnight world. Sweet dreams.
23
January
